: Well, I mean, like, do you wanna be my girlfriend? OK, but for argument's sake Pastor Do you have a religion section? [Cut to game, this year] You are on crack! And if theres one thing worse than chlamydia, its Florida. : Rosemary A harlot. : : Rosemary (Patricia Clarkson): I had a similar situation when I was your age. : Like "by George, that tree has reached the final stage of ecological succession". : If you're still with me - and I'm hoping most of you are - this bring us to part 4. Olive Penderghast [Sarcastically imitates laughing] He left his parents a note that said: Eff you, Im gay.And then he skipped town with a big, hulking black guy! Not that it's any of your busniess, trollop, but he is here by choice. [beat] Oh, I have seventeen years worth of anecdotal proof that He does. Easy A - Rotten Tomatoes Olive Penderghast : Plus lets not forget I had the bbs of a pn star. But then the town realizes she was too harshly judged, and she's really a good person, and she dies a saint. You know, maybe in five minutes, or tonight, or six months from now, or maybe on the night of our wedding. : About Press Copyright Contact us Creators Advertise Developers Terms Privacy Policy & Safety How YouTube works Test new features NFL Sunday Ticket Press Copyright . Totally. Olive Penderghast Olive Penderghast Pastor last week to promote Cruella, Stone delivered Steve Martin's entire "rental car scene" monologue from Planes, Trains and Automobiles without any preparation. : Olive Penderghast On the next Monday, Rhiannon goes to the bathroom with Olive and . Drop them in the comments. That happened. And as we all know, by magic I mean nothing.. I liked Todd much better when he was topless. [to herself] : Rosemary: Whats the rumor mill churning out these days? Olive Penderghast : I might even lose my virginity to him. : Get it? Mostly guys. Not now I don't, shit-dick. Preferably to The Gap, but Id also take Amazon.com, or OfficeMax. : : What is with you gays? A gentleman caller, hurray! Rhiannon Mr. Griffith (Thomas Haden Church): I dont know what your generations fascination is with documenting your every thought, but I can assure you, theyre not all diamonds. A clean-cut high school student relies on the school's rumor mill to advance her social and financial standing.A clean-cut high school student relies on the school's rumor mill to advance her social and financial standing.A clean-cut high school student relies on the school's rumor mill to advance her social and financial standing. Part One: The Shudder-Inducing and Cliched, However Totally False Account Of How I Lost My Virginity To A Guy At A Community College. Craig Gillespie made the unique decision to capture the memorable Cruella moment with a handheld camera that gives a close-up view of Emma Stone's face as her makeup bleeds and she delivers a . Everyone knows Emma Stone can memorize lines, but she surprisingly memorized a monologue from a movie made a year before she was born. : : Summary: Rosemary (Patricia Clarkson in the film) tells Olive (Emma Stone) about her past. It's not true. Rosemary (Patricia Clarkson in the film) tells Olive (Emma Stone) about her past. Olive Penderghast Do you wanna go out with me? : Ah, that Roman. Olive Penderghast And youre going to handle this the same way I did. You can have them when you get taller. : Olive Penderghast Watch Easy A: You Kind Of Look Like A Stripper. first assistant camera: "b" camera (as F. Ulysses Domalaon) [welcoming Brandon into her upstairs bedroom] Hey Olive! : : Don't tell anyone I'm doing this - please [opens a drawer and takes out a handful of condoms, then hands them to Olive]. Right above the Orient. Don't come camping with us, just know I hate you, bitch. Olive Penderghast Hate, Mad, World. I meant about Gibbons' being a fascist. No, I didn't. This was just a free preview - for the main event log onto "www.freeolive.com" tonight at six p.m. And I know it interferes with the basketball game; but come on, would you rather be here cheering on the Woodchucks or watch me do one? Olive Penderghast Olive Penderghast : 'Easy A' (Rosemary): "I had a similar situation when I was your age" Olive Penderghast Does it only exist in 80's movies? Raise the roof. Who gives a rats ass? Summary: Rosemary (Patricia Clarkson in the film) tells Olive (Emma Stone) about her past. : Olive Penderghast Yeah, right. : I had a horrible reputation. Rhiannon You're wonderful. The things that make you most mad about the world tend to be the things that you hate in yourself. Marianne Olive Penderghast [faces him again] I could help, maybe. : I also heard he was twice your age. Well, I was really hoping to get an "A". Do you wanna have sex with me or not? And you know what? [talking to Marianne] Get it? So many great monologues in the 2014 movie Birdman: Or (The Unexpected Virtue of Ignorance), but this one may be the best. : : : : : This is an obvious (and proud of it) homage to the great teen films of John Hughes. : [in Woodchuck costume carrying head] Rhiannon Olive Penderghast Due to his "condition," Micah was sent on an extended visit to his grandparents' in Palatka, Florida. Yeah, I know that. Evan Anson : : Yeah. Woodchuck Todd Oh, it's nothing. Death, Forever, Dying. You left your glass slipper at the party the other night. What if I told you I wanna be dragged into it? Ohhhhh, burn! : Disney World is much more liberal. Olive Penderghast Olive: Let the record show that I, Olive Penderghast, being of sound mind, ample-ish breast size and an occasional corny knock-knock joke do enter this video blog in the case against me. It was like setting up Jenga. Olive Penderghast : : Dill : I'm swell, guy-I've-never-laid-eyes-on-before. Just kidding! Sorry, I got around. : : Totally. Emma Stone's Easy A Monologue Audition - YouTube : Chip Woodchuck Todd I just want you to know that I also took a lot of heat because of a certain dalliance. : I want every detail! Give it up for the woodchucks! : A wizard? Olive: Tom Cruise? A gnome? [whispers to Olive] [spiteful] That must have been pretty embarrassing. You didn't have? Rhiannon: Now youre a super slut like me. Brandon Olive Penderghast Rhi, I'm not that kind of girl. Guys we were going to do this at the right time! Crushing it! Olive Penderghast : : And if there's one thing worse than chlamydia, it's Florida. : Rosemary I don't know what your generation's fascination is with documenting your every thought but I can assure you, they're not all diamonds. How is that my problem, amigo? : Olive Penderghast Olive Penderghast Which really is just my obnoxious way of saying lies travel fast. So they got Rhiannon. We haven't talked in a while - how've you been, Brandon? [Cut to Marianne handing out pamphlets] Everything according to plan. You know, the sad thing is, Evan, if you'd been a gentleman and maybe asked me out on a date, I might've said yes. : Marianne Olive: Due to his condition, Micah was sent on an extended visit to his grandparents in Palatka, Florida. His, with a capital H. If the Good Lord had wanted Micah to graduate, he would have given him the right answers. Hey, I want my Juicy sweatshirt back! But no, no, John Hughes did not direct my life. I wanna be in detention! Hey Olive. I don't want to know anything from you. Oh my God! Dill: Oh, clever wordplay. This is hard to say but Don Bryant is your father. It doesn't have to be a boink. [excited] The books you read in class always seems to have a strong connection with whatever angsty adolescent drama is being recounted. : Olive Penderghast : : Olive Penderghast Although we were kind of hoping you'd get "knocked up" so we'd have a second shot at raising kids, really do it right this time. Olive Penderghast Woodchuck Todd Olive Penderghast Marianne: Theres a higher power that will judge you for your indecency. Rosemary Remember Emma Stone In Easy A? Here Are 15 BTS Facts About The Film Olive Penderghast I had to hear from *Jackie Rudedsky*. Olive Penderghast Olive Penderghast Perhaps you should embroider a red A on your wardrobe, you abominable tramp. Olive Penderghast All I could think was, "Great, now I'm a tramp! "Roman is having an OK day, and bought a Coke Zero at the gas station. Olive Penderghast Olive: Thats the one thing that trumps religion: capitalism. : Olive Penderghast The principal is like a captain of a ship in international waters. : Michael P. Catanzarite . : Not that one. What's the rumor mill churning out these days? It's right over there. No, you haven't. I got that "V" where you'd rather see a "P". Perhaps you should GET a wardrobe, you abominable twat. Who told you? Mostly guys. Olive Penderghast : [welcoming Brandon into her upstairs bedroom], [about Natasha Bedingfield's "Pocketful of Sunshine"], [referring to Olive's alleged weekend date with a boyfriend], [while pretending to have sex with Olive and she's hitting him with a book], [after pretending to have sex with Brandon], [about her business of pretending to have sex with people], [V.O, while confronted with Marianne's mob]. The actress said she was "going nuts" during the filming of the teen comedy. Olive Penderghast : : : Olive Penderghast Olive: He got a Coke Zero a-gain. [Tries again] Here Are The Best Free Monologues for Teenagers (Drama, Comedy, More You get family member of the week every week. But no, John Hughes did not direct my life. Evan : : : The books you read in class always seem to have a strong connection with whatever angsty adolescent drama is being recounted. Screw all these people, Olive! Aren't there, like, child labor laws against this? We are officially over! : : So it was time to put an end to this once and for all by telling my side of the story. NO, I don't like that! He left his parents a note that said: Fuck you, I'm gay. A heap. Rhiannon I don't know when it will happen. Relax. Olive Penderghast Except that's the one thing movies don't tell you: how shitty it feels to be an outcast. So the next day I had detention. Olive: Oh my God! You know, I did hear something. Easy A - i want my life to be like in the 80's movies - YouTube Principal Gibbons (Malcolm McDowell): This is public school. Rhiannon So it's his choice that he's a fourth year senior who can't pass any test he takes? We love you no matter what the sexual orientation of your opposite-sex sex partner Olive Penderghast Olive Penderghast : Olive Penderghast Mrs. Griffith Funny, bitter-sweet and intelligent, Easy A narrates a plucky girl's struggle with handling a simple spat of dishonesty as it unravels into a fat web of lies and an eventual bad reputation.. Ha Rosemary That boy from yesterday just dropped this off for you Olive Penderghast : Olive Penderghast People suck! : Olive Penderghast [about Natasha Bedingfield's "Pocketful of Sunshine"] He said something about askin' for your hand in marriage! "Whatever happened to chivalry," and lists movie scenes as examples (clips of which accompany her monologue), one of . I am, in fact, considering becoming an existentialist. And then he skipped town with a big, hulking black guy! Olive Penderghast That's not necessary, Dad, but that is comforting. Is it not a minister? Here you go. : This is exactly why they put you in the gas chamber if you take your head off at Disney World. Olive Penderghast I want John Cusack holding a boombox outside my window. Rosemary: Olive! Oh, clever wordplay. It's all I can afford. It didn't happen! I also heard he gave you crabs. : What's going on, honey? The kind that does it, or the kind that does it and doesn't have the lady-balls to tell her friend? Fabulous! Tell me to say 'Hail Marys'? Because I was a s. But the really amazing thing is, it is nobody's goddamn business. You know, I dated a homosexual once. I could have chlamydia. I was just wondering if there's a minster around? Before I met Dad, I had incredibly low self-worth and I spread my legs for anyone. Guys, we were going to do this at the right time. : And, *boy*, did my Terminological Inexactitude accelerate with velocity. Olive:If hes so smart, why is your boyfriend 22 years old and still in high school? Welcome. : [Mocks interest] : : : George is like what you name your teddy bear, not the name you wanna scream out during climax. : What? No, actually, that was a rhetorical question. : We are not dating, Mom. You know, not really. I just thought of the funniest thing. Warranted or not. Type above and press Enter to search. Are you really that repulsed by lady parts? Easy A Monologue, Olive (Emma Stone). Well, put it in the pile of gifts from my other suitors. : Olive: Hi, Im looking for the Bible. People thought I was a dirty skank? Course you will. : : Olive Penderghast What makes life valuable is that it doesn't last forever. Oh, you *really* do. Never underestimate the power of extremists like Marianne. : Haven't you heard? You're thinking of Disneyland. When the actor was . : Blue Devils! Rhiannon: I want every detail, now shit face. Olive Penderghast Marianne Bryant is the secretary of the student council, chairman of the Orange Blossom Dance Committee, and president of the Cross Your Heart Club - a club dedicated to shoving their beliefs down people's throats. Raise the roof." : Olive Penderghast Woodchuck Todd : Gossipy Girl : Olive Penderghast : Waiting for me outside the bedroom door for me to kiss Todd.